Author Archives: Queen of My Kingdom

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About Queen of My Kingdom

After 65 years of life, I have experienced many things, some great, some not so great. I am a work in progress and I'm learning to not "sweat the small stuff". Life is too short so live, love, travel, and play pickleball.

What is the Truth – Part 3

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Day 2 in Neverland

Apparently, I was given something to relax me because the next thing I know is that it is morning.  I was taken down for an MRI to look a little closer at my head.  Things seemed to be fine, but I still had no memory of the accident or this man that claims to be my husband.  They continued to give me something to keep me calm when the doctor brought this Mark guy back into my room.

“Good morning.  I don’t want to scare you or upset you, so there is no pressure from me, ok?” said Mark. 

“Look, I am sure you are a nice guy, but I don’t know you and you are certainly not my husband. I don’t understand what is going on.  Where are my kids?  Why aren’t they here with Keith?  Where is Keith?”  I could feel the anxiety building up again and that crushing weight in my chest when Dr. DeMonte jumped into the conversation.

“Good morning all.  I have looked at your MRI and I can see no abnormalities.   Everything looks fine.  My guess is your brain is still healing from the trauma and your memory will return eventually.”  I responded to this news very quickly.  “My memory is fine Dr. DeMonte.  I know who I am, I know where I live, and I know who my husband and children are.  What I don’t know is where they all are and why they aren’t here.”

Again, Dr. DeMonte asked Mark if he could leave the room for a few minutes.  He needed to have a serious discussion with me apparently.

Dr. DeMonte begins, “Mrs. Thompson, I am going to try and explain things the best way I know how.” Angrily I respond, “Don’t call me Mrs. Thompson.  That is not my name.  My name is Marcy King.”  “I’m sorry,” replied the doctor.  “Let’s just go with Marcy at this time.  I can see that this is very difficult and something you completely don’t understand.  I am going to keep an eye on you for a couple more days and see how your memory goes.  Because I don’t see any damage in the MRI, I am confident that the memory of your life with Mr. Thompson will return.  When you are well enough to go home, I will have to release you to go with him or another family member.  Our records show that he is indeed your husband.” 

There are no words left for me to say as the tears spill from my eyes.  At this point, I begin to sob uncontrollably, and Dr. DeMonte puts his arms around me and lets me cry.  Once I begin to get a grip momentarily on my emotions, he releases me and says he will be back to check on me in a bit. 

A new nurse came into my room.  His name tag said Faaborg.  He had a great smile and for some reason, he felt familiar and made me feel safe.  “Hey, pretty lady.  I hear you are having a rough go of it.  How would you like to hop into this wheelchair and get some fresh air?”

I glanced up at his name tag wondering how to pronounce his name when he looked at me and said, “Just call me Jim.” 

“Ok, Jim.  I think some fresh air would be great.”   

“It’s a beautiful fall day outside and the temperature is a perfect 75 degrees with a light southerly breeze.  Would be a great day to be out on a sailboat for sure.” 

Well, that got my attention.  Keith and I had a sailboat once upon a time.  In fact, we had our first date on that very sailboat.  Jim was right, sounded like perfect sailing weather.  He helped me up ever so slowly, guided me into the wheelchair and down the hall we went. 

“I think the garden will be the perfect place for you to get some fresh air.” He sat me next to a small table where I could get a little sun and breathe in the fresh air.  He offered to get me a glass of iced tea and said he would be back in a flash. 

The garden was full of pansies and the leaves were beginning to turn beautiful reds, yellows and oranges.  It smelled and felt like fall.  Keith and I love fall.  I closed my eyes and let the warm sun shine on my face……. My mind was suddenly somewhere else.  I felt like I was being transported through a tunnel.

When I opened my eyes, I was on my ebike riding behind Keith down a beautiful paved path through the trees. “Do you want to lead?” asked Keith.  “No.  You are doing a great job.  Keep going.” I replied.

We crossed the road, passed the dog park and headed out onto a dirt trail for about a mile.  At the end of the path, we had reached it, “our bench” facing the lake.  We parked the bikes and I went over and sat on our bench.  Keith brought over a small thermos.  He had made us a mimosa to share while we sat together looking at the lake.  We sat sipping our mimosas, just sitting quietly enjoying each other’s company.  We never felt the need to fill the silence with idle conversation.  We were comfortable just sharing the experience.

“Ok, our mimosas are officially gone. What do you want to do now?” asked Keith.  I had the perfect answer to the perfect morning. “Let’s ride home, do a little hot tub time, and then have some adventure upstairs in the playroom.”

“I like the way you think Mrs. King.   Lead the way.”

I was suddenly jolted when Jim returned with my iced tea.    “I’m sorry I woke you.  Hope you were having a good dream.”

A tear dropped from my eye when I responded.  “You have no idea just how good.”

After a bit, Jim took me back up to my room and I asked to sit in the recliner.  The fresh air and sunshine felt great.  I could feel myself getting stronger both physically and mentally.  While nothing still made sense, my drive to find Keith and my kids was unwavering.  I was just going to have to do it on my terms.  No one apparently was going to help me.

I was sitting quietly sipping my iced tea thinking about Keith when the door to my room opened.  All I could think was, what now.  Mark had returned and asked if he could come in. 

“Tell me your name again,” I asked. 

“Mark.  Mark Thompson.  I know you still don’t remember me, but do you remember anyone named Carol?”

Now we were getting somewhere.  I replied, “Yes, my best friend in high school’s name was Carol.” 

“Great,” replied Mark.  “You remember your sister.” 

“Um no.  I don’t have a sister.  Carol Norman and I bowled together and were best friends.  We were even college roommates.  She went on to become a professional bowler on the women’s pro tour.”

Mark asked, “Could you be confusing your sister Carol with ‘bowling’ Carol?”  Boy was this exhausting.  I replied, “No.  I don’t have a sister.  In fact, I’m an only child.”  I could see the lines forming on Mark’s forehead and the confusion setting in.  Finally, he said, “OK.  I’ll leave you alone for now.”  I almost felt sorry for him.

Mark went out into the hall and walked down to the sitting area to call Carol.   She answered on the first ring. 

“Good news I hope.”

“Nope.  She still doesn’t know me, and she says she doesn’t have a sister.” 

“Let me rearrange my schedule and get down there.”

“Not sure it’s a good idea at this point.  Let’s give it some time.  I’ll keep you posted.”

“How much longer are they going to keep her in the hospital?”

“I think they are going to release her to go home in the morning.  Except she doesn’t remember home.  Maybe after we get to the house and she sees the pictures and stuff it will jog her memory.”

“Let’s hope.  I’m here if you need me.”

What is the Truth – Part 2

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Welcome to Neverland

I became aware of sounds and a steady beeping.  When I opened my eyes, things were a bit fuzzy.  After a minute or two I realized that I was in the hospital hooked up to machines. There was a nurse hovering over me.  Her name tag said Dotson.

“Hey, you are awake.  You gave us quite a scare.”

“Where am I?”

“Well sweetie, you are at OU Medical Center in our beautiful Intensive Care Unit.” 

“Why?” 

“You were in a pretty serious accident and needed critical care.  I need to let the doctor know you are awake.  Just give me a minute and I’ll go and get your husband.” 

Well, thank God.  Keith was here and he could explain everything to me.  She left the room and a man entered with tears in his eyes.  He came toward me smiling and was reaching for my hand.

“You had me so worried.  I knew you would come back to me.”

“Who are you?” I asked.

Before he could answer the doctor came into the room and started looking me over and having me look at lights and answer questions.

“Welcome back.  I am Dr. DeMonte.”

“What happened to me?”

“You had a pretty serious car accident five days ago.  Do you remember anything about the event?” 

“No, nothing.”

“It was a pretty severe crash and you were airlifted from Ardmore to us here in Oklahoma City.  You have been in a coma since you arrived.  Miraculously, you sustained no major injuries.”

Nurse Dotson stepped back into the room smiling and I asked her if she would go and get my husband.  She looked a bit confused by my request.  She looked over at that man that was standing in my room and he looked at her. 

“Marcy, it’s me, Mark.”

“I’m sorry.  I don’t know you.  I need someone to go and get my husband.”

At this point, Dr. DeMonte looked up from my medical chart and asked everyone to leave the room.  He pulled up a chair by my bed and sat down.

“Do you know the man that was just in your room?”

“No.  I really need for you guys to go and get my husband.”

There was an awkward silence at this point when Dr. DeMonte said, “That was your husband.”  I emphatically replied, “No, that was not my husband.  My husband is Keith King.  I’m sure he is out in the hallway if you will just go get him.”

Dr. DeMonte got very quiet and said that he felt a few tests might be needed.  He stated that I seemed to have some form of amnesia, which was not uncommon after the head trauma I had suffered in the accident.

Panic began to take over when I said, “Look, I don’t know what kind of joke you guys are trying to play here, but I need you to go and get my husband and I mean now or I am going to start to scream.”

Tears began to stream down my face and I felt a crushing weight in my chest.  What was happening and where is Keith?  I couldn’t breathe and all I wanted to do was scream, then I don’t remember anything.

Dr. DeMonte looked up and said, “Thank you nurse for giving Mrs. Thompson a little something in her IV to relax her. I think we may have a bigger problem here.”

Dr. DeMonte walked out into the hall and asked Mark to come with him.  They went down the hall into an office.  The doctor asked Mark to sit.

“Mr. Thompson, your wife has no memory of you or your life together.  She was quite upset when I finished talking with her and we have given her something to make her relax.  I am going to run a few tests in the morning just to make sure we aren’t missing something and to determine if anything else is going on.”

“How can she not remember me or our life together?”

“She had a very serious accident and is lucky to be alive.  It may just take some time.  Her brain may still be healing.  It is not uncommon for brain trauma patients to experience some amnesia.  I must admit it does seem a bit odd because she is convinced that not only are you not her husband, but her husband has a name, and it’s not your name. I’m going to go check on her again and I want you to check back with me in the morning.” 

“Do you mind if I sit in here for a bit?  I need to make a few phone calls.”

“Sure,” Dr. DeMonte responded. “Take your time.” 

Mark took out his phone and dialed Carol, Marcy’s sister.  Carol answered the phone on the first ring.

“Mark?  I have been waiting for your call.  You said she was awake.  Is she ok?  Tell me what’s going on.”

A moment passed and Carol could hear what she thought was Mark crying.

“Mark! Talk to me.  What’s going on?  Is she OK?”

“She is awake and seems fine physically.”

“Oh thank God.”

“Well, it’s not quite that simple.  She doesn’t know who I am.” 

“What do you mean she doesn’t know who you are?”

“They called me into her room because she was awake.  She looked up at me when I came into the room and there was no recognition in her eyes when she saw me.  Then she asked the nurse to go bring in her husband.” 

“Well that just makes no sense.”

“The doctor said it is not all that uncommon for there to be some amnesia following a traumatic brain injury.  She was very upset when she was told ‘I’ was her husband.  She kept demanding they go get some guy named Keith King.  She thinks ‘he’ is her husband.”

Things got very quiet for a moment when Carol asked, “Do you need me to come?  I can move some stuff around in my schedule and be there in a few days.” 

“Let’s give it some time first.  Let me feel her out.  If she remembers you then it might be good to have you here.  If she doesn’t, I think it could make matters worse.” 

“That makes sense.  Call me later.” 

“Will do.”

What is the Truth?

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This short story came about rather suddenly.  I like writing but it’s really for my own entertainment or my sanity even.  Sometimes I get a story or idea in my head, and I just need to put it on paper. 

This short story came to me after going to the movie theater during the big COVID shutdown during the summer of 2020.  As usual, my husband wanted to go see this movie which was an action/ espionage/time-travel movie.  It was one of those movies that you couldn’t really follow and when it was over you didn’t really know for sure what you had seen. 

Riding home in the car I got this idea.  What if I took the essence of the movie and wrote a little story that would be a cross between a sci-fi movie, the Wizard of Oz and the Hallmark Channel.

What could go wrong there?

And so, it begins

I always seem to get up before everyone when I visit Arkansas.  I try to be very quiet when I get up but Harper the “puggle” always knows and Molly my granddaughter usually knows.  I stumble into the kitchen to make coffee and I hear my daughter Loni let Harper out of their room.  “Good morning Harper,” I say and bend over and scruff her neck.  Then I open the back door so she can go outside to do her thing.  I popped the k-cup into the Keurig and I am on my way to normal.  And there is she is, Molly.

“Good morning Mimi.  Are we going to sit outside and have coffee this morning?”

“I think it would be a great morning to sit outside and have coffee this morning, but I think I’m the only one having coffee.”

With a roll of her eyes Molly replies, “I know that Mimi.”

So there we were Mimi, Molly and Harper.  It is very quiet outside, it’s very early.  I’m not sure the birds are even awake yet.  I take a few sips of coffee and Molly says, “Mimi, tell me how you and Papa met.”  She’s heard this story before, but she always likes to hear it again.  “OK Molly.”  I reply.

You know it really is a great story.  I met Keith online in 2003.  Scandalous I know.  Online dating was kind of a new thing back then and not near as sophisticated as it is today with its algorithms and all.  Back then you put in your zip code, told Yahoo Personals how far outside of your zip code you wanted to look, what age of a person you were looking for and if you were a woman looking for a man or a man looking for a woman.  I don’t recall if it asked me if I was a woman, looking for a woman.   Anyway, once you put in these few items and hit enter, you were shown pictures of people that fell within the criteria you entered.  I really wasn’t serious about finding someone using this method, but I was curious.  Would it even show me anyone that I could be remotely interested in?  YES, IT WOULD.

There he was.  This very handsome professional looking man.  No names were given, but if you clicked on the picture, it took you to their profile information.  What they like and what they are looking for in someone to date.  Keith called it his “marketing plan.”   I read over the profile several times and thought, this guy sounds perfect.  So why is he single and looking for someone online?  Wait, I’m single and I’m looking at people online.  I could look at him all I wanted and second guess myself, or I could make the best investment of my life and spend $19.95 to email him.  Yes, that’s what I said, just $19.95 to email him.  The rest is history as they say.

I always enjoy my visits to see the Milligan’s.  We had a great last day and I was headed home the next morning.  Keith was working part-time for a few more months, so on the weeks he works, I head to Arkansas to spend a little time with my daughter and her family.

It’s quiet in the house now.  The kids have school tomorrow and are sound asleep.  I have retired to my room to start packing.  Once the kids leave for school in the morning, I will head back to Oklahoma.  About then my evening call comes in.

“Hello my wife, when are you coming home to me?”

“I’ll be on the road by 9.  So when will you be coming home to me after work?”

“I’ll be home at 4:38 p.m.”

“Great! You will find me wearing your favorite outfit and we will see where things go from there.”

“Excellent.” He responded. 

We talked for a few more minutes catching up on each other’s day when I asked,

“How are my fur baby girls?” 

“They miss their mom. I miss their mom.”

“I miss you guys too.  Give Daisy and Ellie kisses from me and I will see you all tomorrow.”

“What time will you be home?”

“If I can really get on the road by 9 a.m., I should get home about 3.”

“Well drive carefully.  I’ll be watching your progress on the 360 app.”

“I have no doubt.”

“See you tomorrow my love.  I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Well, it’s Monday morning and I’m up early again, coffee in hand when Max my grandson pops into the room.  He is never up early, but he wanted to see me before he had to go to school.

“Mimi, I hate it when you have to go home.”

“I know buddy.  I’ll see you next month and we will go play more pickleball.  I think we should try out the new courts over in Sherwood.”

“Sounds great!  Be careful going home today.”

“Always,” I replied.

I kiss everyone bye as they head off for school.  I send Keith a little text message telling him I am on my way.  The usual, “be careful” response is returned.  I have the second half of my audiobook to listen to on my drive home.  I love a good John Sanford book.  Lucas Davenport is up to his eyeballs as usual in some federal crime spree.  I’m sure he will figure it all out and save the day.  We all like happy endings, don’t we? 

The drive was uneventful as usual, and I pulled into my little town in southern Oklahoma at 3:05 p.m.  I was stopped at the light at Commerce and Veterans Boulevard waiting to turn left when I called Loni to tell her I had arrived home safely.  We were chatting away via the car phone when my light turned green.  I moved forward into the intersection to turn left when I saw something out of the corner of my eye to the right.

An Interview with a Little League Baseball Player

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Last summer while visiting the grandkids, I got the opportunity to watch my grandson Max play some baseball and attend my granddaughter Molly’s annual dance recital. While I was watching Max play ball, which I love to do, it reminded me of when I spent countless years watching his Uncle Craig play little league ball.

I know exactly what my daughter goes through, because I have been there. It’s a lot of time and all you want is for them to do good, have fun and feel good about how they played. And of course, you want them to win every game. My daughter, Loni, has an added level of stress, Max plays in a competitive travel league. AND ITS BIG BUSINESS.

Max and his Uncle Craig have some similar traits, that I see especially when I watch Max play baseball. It’s crazy when you think about how ingrained some genetics are. Max and his Uncle Craig live 400 miles apart and don’t get to see each other very much, so when I see the similarities, you know its genetics. Both are very serious about the game, are hard on themselves when they think they have messed up, overthink things and are exceptional athletes. One of Craig’s favorite things to do was to steal bases. He was fast and his coaches took advantage of that. Max also loves to steal bases and he’s fast too. When I watch Max steal a base, it’s almost like reliving my time as a baseball mom.

So last summer when I was in Arkansas watching Max, it got me to thinking. I know Max is a typical 12-year-old boy and can be very cooperative or argumentative. He likes to procrastinate at home and he’s not quick to follow his parents’ instructions, most of the time. Again, typical pre-teen. It got me to wondering, how does Max respond to his coaches when they give him directions? What better way to find out than to interview him? So, I sat him down in the dining room following one of his games and did just that.

THE INTERVIEW

  • Mimi: When you are standing on home plate waiting for the ball to come, what does through your mind?
  • Max: I’m mainly thinking if it’s a fast pitcher, I aim for right center. A slower pitcher, I aim for dead center.
  • Mimi: You have enough control to put the ball where you want to?
  • Max: Yes.
  • Mimi: When you are standing on home plate waiting for the pitch, I notice that there is a coach on third base giving you signs. Is he telling you what to do?
  • Max: Yea.
  • Mimi: So how does that mess with you? What if you get up there and know this is a fast pitcher and you want to hit to right center and he tells you to bunt? What do you do?
  • Max: I bunt.
  • Mimi: When you are on base and you are stealing, are you listening to a coach to tell you when to go or are you just going on your own?
  • Max: He gives me the sign and I go.
  • Mimi: When you are standing out there in the outfield, I know it can get very boring sometimes. When that big fly ball comes right for you, what’s going through your mind?
  • Max: Step back, turn my shoulders and run backwards.
  • Mimi: So, you have a plan?
  • Max: Yes.
  • Mimi: What happens if it is coming between you and the guy over in left field?
  • Max: I’ll call off the left fielder if it’s closer to me, but if it’s closer to him, he will call me off.
  • Mimi: What do you think the hardest position to play is?
  • Max: Definitely catcher, especially wearing the gear all day in the heat of the summer.
  • Mimi: What would be the best position to have?
  • Max: Whatever position you are good at is the one that is the best position.
  • Mimi: What is your favorite thing about playing?
  • Max: Having fun with all my friends
  • Mimi: And the worst thing?
  • Max: Having to get up at 8:30 in the morning.

MY TAKE AWAYS?

Max

To my surprise and delight, Max showed me that he is a very mature young man with a great head on his shoulders. He understands teamwork and follows the directions of his coaches. They have taught him the basic skills of the game and he follows them when told. He has confidence in his game. There was no sign of him second-guessing anything

I was thrilled to hear that his favorite part about playing is having fun with his friends. Not shocking was that he didn’t want to get up at 8:30 to have to go play. I know he has had to get up much earlier than that when they travel but he’s probably still in a fog and doesn’t remember that.

I will travel back to Arkansas this summer to watch Max play again, but this time, I know his game plan and that he’s got it. Who knows, I might need a follow-up interview with the future major league baseball player.

Pickleball in Punta Gorda

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My husband and I started a new tradition when I turned 60 two years ago. Let’s go somewhere fun and play pickleball for my birthday. When I hit the big 60, we traveled to Las Vegas to play at the Plaza. For those of you that don’t know, the pickleball courts are on the pool deck on about the 5th floor. Shockingly, it was pretty chilly in Vegas on December 30. But we did find one other couple who was visiting from Canada, and we had a few good matches, weather allowing.

Then Covid hit and we did not travel anywhere for my birthday the following year. So, we still have Covid, but things seem a bit more flexible. In September we started planning for my 62nd birthday pickleball adventure. We have both been vaccinated and boosted and were ready to go. But this time, let’s go somewhere we are pretty sure will be warm and beautiful. Let’s try Punta Gorda, Florida!

Getting there however, proved to be a bit of a challenge. As I said earlier, we made these plans in September, hotel reservations and flights. We got our bags packed on Sunday for our Monday morning flight. Got up at 6 a.m. Monday morning to learn that our flight had been canceled. Remember seeing all those flight cancellations after Christmas on the news? Yup, ours was one of those. At least we hadn’t gotten to the airport, which is two hours away.

My husband couldn’t book a flight that day, so he found us a flight for Tuesday. The non-stop flights were all gone, so we would have to fly from Dallas to Charlotte, North Carolina and change planes to get to Ft Myers. DFW Airport is a very large place and we have always parked at the Remote North parking lot. It’s just easier than parking at one of the terminals. We arrived at the North Remote Parking to see that it was closed. We have never seen that. Should have known that was a bad sign. We drove into the airport and parked at the terminal our plane was assigned to at 8:15 a.m., checked in and boarded our plane right on time. Exciting. After sitting on that plane for about 45 minutes it was announced that we had a bad tire and that it would take at least an hour to replace it. That means, we will miss our connecting flight. Then they made us all get off the plane.

Lots of people on the plane had connecting flights and now had to find other flights, including us. We found a nonstop from Dallas to Ft Myers, but it didn’t leave until 3:55 p.m. We spent a lot of time Monday wandering the airport all masked up. We boarded the plane on time, and we sit, and we sit, and we sit. About an hour later, we were told that the plane had a mechanical problem, and we all had to get off. Really? Again? This time they are going to find us another plane.

All 173 of us had to go from Terminal A to Terminal D via Skylink. We boarded our new plane, and we were finally on our way. It just took one car, two trains and three planes. The sun was setting, and the day was pretty much done in Dallas. Next up, Punta Gorda.

Leaving Dallas as the sun sets

By the time we landed in Ft Myers, got our rental car and drove up to Punta Gorda, it was 10:30 p.m., and we were exhausted. Tomorrow would be a new day.

We got up, ate a little breakfast and headed out to find the Pickleplex in Punta Gorda. This is a fantastic pickleball venue with 16 beautiful courts. All the courts were full when we arrived, and they were already “stacking paddles.” We signed up, paid our $5 guest fee, stacked our paddles and waited our turn. We played each of the three mornings we were there and met some really nice people. They were very welcoming, and everyone was around our age and skill level. Mostly retired peeps who were wintering in Florida or who had moved to Florida. And why not? The weather was fantastic. I think it was 82 each day we were there, no wind and no rain. It was perfect.

We have never been to that part of Florida, and we know that we want to go back. Lots to see and do besides pickleball. We ate at two very yummy restaurants; Hemingway’s and Carmello’s Italian for my birthday. Carmello’s may be our new favorite restaurant. We had lunch at the Village Fish Market overlooking the bay and took walks along the water. The margarita I had from the bar at the top of the Wyvern Hotel packed quite a punch, but I am a bit of a lightweight. Thank you, Punta Gorda, for your hospitality. Maybe next time we bring the RV and stay for an entire month.

The retirement countdown continues, less than five months to go.

Life with Daisy – Day Four

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Well sadly I’m way behind in posting about our new baby Daisy. She is now ten months old and we have a playmate for her that is 5 months old. Wow, how time flies when you have new dogs in the house. I’m going to try and catch you up on our “dog” adventures. Let’s start with this one, when Daisy had been with us a whole four days…..

Today we will begin our 4th full day with Daisy.  All 2.9 pounds of her arrived around 6 p.m., Thursday night.  What a little doll.  I don’t believe I have ever had a dog that small.  She was kind of quiet and seemed a bit shy.  At a little over seven weeks old, this will be the first night away from everything she has ever known.  What can go wrong there?

We have been planning to receive our new baby for three weeks now.  Her special area was all ready.  We had her food, bed, baby blankets, toys, pee pads.  So just four hours after she arrived, it was time to go to bed.  Now the hard part begins.  We put her in her bed in her special area and off to sleep she went.  Huh, how about that.  I woke up at 2 a.m. and thought, wow still no crying.  When I rolled over in bed and was facing the side of the bed my husband was on, there was a little black and white blob.  Well good grief, what kind of mother am I?  I didn’t even hear her cry.  But my husband did and didn’t have the heart to let her cry it out.  I kept worrying about her waking up and my not hearing it.  So I just kept watching her.  At 3:20 a.m., her eyes popped open and our day officially began. 

My husband and I both stayed home from work Friday to be with her.  We did all the usual things.  We took her to my office, to his office and to Petco of course because we apparently hadn’t gotten everything we needed.  We chased her around Friday and worked hard to get her to go potty where she was supposed to go potty.  Grass was a new concept for her but the pee pads were a really good thing. By the time Friday night rolled around, we decided to just put her in bed with us. 

Daisy slept on my side of the bed, but what she really wanted to do was sleep on top of my head.  I battled this dog for hours trying to get her to sleep where I wanted her to sleep and her letting me know that we were playing by her rules.  So I had another 4 hours of off and on sleep when I was jolted awake because she finally fell off the bed.  Up at 4 a.m., Daisy and I began our day again.  My entire Saturday felt like I had jetlag without the fun trip.  I was a walking zombie and my husband was not far behind me.  As we got ready to go to bed Saturday night, my husband asks, “What are we going to do tonight?”  I had a very firm answer for him, “I don’t know.”  What in the world have we gotten ourselves into?  Are we too old for this?  After a few minutes my husband made the decision.  Tonight she sleeps in her bed in her special place and we will do our best not to go get her if she cries.  “Deal.” I reply. 

I put all of Daisy’s toys in her area and put the t-shirt I had worn that day in her bed.  She curled up and went right to sleep.   We tiptoed past her to get to our room, fell into bed and I don’t remember much after that.  At 5:30 a.m., after 8 glorious hours of sleep, I woke up and looked around the bed.  No dog.  Did she really sleep in her bed all night and not cry?  I jumped up, put on my robe and quietly opened the door to her room.  There she was, sitting in her bed with one of her toys.  When she saw me she got up and came to me with her little tail wagging and covering my face with kisses.  Wow, she did it.  We were on to something here.

The most important thing in new puppy training that I had forgotten while in my brain fog and severe fatigue was consistency.  Babies, children and puppies need consistency.  Daisy needed to be loved, to play hard, eat nutritious food and learn a routine.  I’m told a Shih Tzu will respond very well to treats while training.  We are finding that to be the case for sure.  At just 3 pounds, it’s a little hard to push through the heavy vinyl of the dog door.  But put a tasty treat on the other side and call her, she can get through, although its slow right now.  She even went through it on her own yesterday, but then wasn’t sure how to get back in.  We are working on that.

I have also learned that she is like a baby or toddler because she need naps.  Lots of naps.  She loves her bed and when she gets tired, she just goes and gets in her bed and takes a nap.  If she is playing with us and we notice that she is playing too rough with those sharp little teeth, we know she is tired.  Instead of crying like little kids do when they are overly tired, she just gets too wound up and can’t seem to get control of her emotions.  We put her in her bed and she goes right to sleep.  My human kids weren’t that easy to put to bed.

Another really exciting thing we are noticing today is that she seems to be getting an idea of when she needs to potty and going to the appropriate place.  The ultimate goal for Daisy is to use the dog door and to go out to the yard area we have for her to do her business.  The sun is finally shining here today and hopefully no more rain for a few days.  I think we can make some real progress with potty training this week.

Well nap time is almost over.  I have got to go get those training treats ready for our next opportunity to learn. 

Adventure Day 2 – Southern Utah

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The adventure Kings had a nice quiet morning before our afternoon of broadening my horizons.  Today we unhooked the RV again and headed back to Orderville for the Elkheart Canyoneering experience.  The entire reason Keith wanted to come to Utah was to see slot canyons.  We experienced our first one yesterday, but the climbing over the boulders within the slot canyon wore me smooth out.  Today’s adventure was a little different.  This time we parked at the bottom of the canyon, hiked to the top of the canyon, then repelled into the canyon and worked our way out.

One of the things we really enjoyed was using a smaller tour company, East Zion Adventures We were not in huge groups and we didn’t have to do anything in a hurry. On this day, we paired up with a delightful young couple from Tampa, Florida. The wife was in the same boat as I was, we are both married to adventure junkies.  When our guide Eric asked how many of us had “never” repelled, three of the four hands went up.  Keith was our only seasoned adventurer with one repel under this belt.  Eric was great and got all us newbies ready to go. 

I used to think of hiking as just walking along a scenic trail made of gravel or dirt.  Isn’t that what you think of when you consider going hiking.  Each time I have thought that this week I have been so wrong.  When our guide “Joe” from yesterday said that the hardest part of Elkheart Canyon would be the hike up, he was absolutely right.  The path was narrow, steep, and rocky with areas of thick sand.   I know where all that sand was going that was blowing across Arizona when we passed through Friday.  It all landed in Utah. 

Now I’m a gal with just one balance nerve following my surgery 6 years ago.  I don’t have the best balance so when I’m challenged with something narrow and steep, I get concerned.  I don’t let it stop me, but it does concern me, and I try to be extra careful.  Keith was right behind me as always to make sure I didn’t fall off the mountain.  On top of that, we were at a higher altitude than good old Oklahoma and those inclines got my heart rate up to 166 according to my Apple watch.  We stopped a few times along the way so we could all breath. 

We finally made our way to the top and there it was, the 200 year old Juniper tree that was going to hold the ropes so we could repel down.  The first rappel was roughly 100 feet or the equivalent of a 10 story building.  I’m not panicking yet.  Our guide is getting things set up and then he tries to be funny and tells us he will just see us at the bottom.  Ha ha.  When he finished explaining our instructions, Keith the experienced one went first.  I watched my husband start down and then over the side where I could no longer see him.  He made it safely to the bottom. Eric looked at the three of us and asked, “who is next?” I heard a woman say, “I’ll go.” That woman was me. I volunteered to go next. Eric got me all hooked up, answered a few more of my questions and off I went, slow and steady.

And guess what?  I DID IT AND I LOVED IT!  We all did, even our two new friends from Florida.  We worked our way through the slot canyon and Eric would give us a little history about the creation of the slot canyons. I apparently did not pay attention to my geography classes in high school. Eric was the perfect blend of knowledge and fun today.  Towards the end of the canyon we had two additional repels that were narrow and awkward.  No problem.  Now I’m wondering when I can repel again.  I know, who is this woman?

Well a successful fun day for sure.  Tomorrow is our last day here at the Ponderosa.  What could be in store for us?

Adventure Day 1 – Southern Utah

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Any time we travel and change time zones it messes with my sleep. My eyes popped open at 4 a.m., but I refused to get up.  I forced myself to doze until 6.  So up I go, make the coffee and inch the heater up a bit.  Yes, it’s cold here.  How cold?  Well that’s a great question that I can’t answer.  We have discovered that we have no cell service, no Internet and no TV stations at our little RV spot.  Which means, no email, no text messages, no phone calls, NO NOTHING.  As you can imagine out in the middle of nowhere, cell service is spotty.  I’m sure somewhere along our journey today we will hit a cell tower.  I’m just hoping my daughter hasn’t called out the National Guard if she has been trying to reach me.  Guess I better let her know first about our situation when we reach civilization.

So today Keith has signed us up for three things:  Red Canyon Jeep Tour, Crimson Canyon Hike & UTV Adventure and a Sunset guided hike.  I think it is safe to say that I just trust Keith when he is scheduling activities for us because one of our adventures today, I was definitely not prepared for.  More on that in a bit.

Red Canyon

Let’s start with the Red Canyon Jeep Tour.  When we finally got cell service we discovered that it was 43 degrees and the high was only supposed to be around 54.  I was not really prepared for this turn in the weather, but I put on a couple of layers and we headed out to East Zion Adventures to get our day started.  Eight fellow adventurers and our two guides piled into an “open air” jeep type thing.  Our guide told us that we had about a 12 mile ride before arriving on the property where they would drive us out to see the Red Canyon.  We finally reached the property and headed off road.  The trail, if we can call it that was extremely rough, it was very windy and cold.  We were all wrapped in blankets with our hoods over our heads trying to stay warm until we reached the Red Canyon.  The view was spectacular.  We spent a little time at the overlook walking around taking pics and then we headed back to the Ponderosa.  Tour guides on these kinds of trips can provide some great historical references for what you are seeing [which I enjoy] and they can be people who just like to hear themselves talk [which I don’t enjoy].  Our tour guide “Jeff” liked to hear himself talk. 

We learned that we were going to have to drive over to where our second adventure of the day was scheduled.  That meant that we were going to have to unhook and drive the RV about 30 miles to Orderville, Utah.  Remember the tour I said I was not prepared for?  Well this is the one.  We met our group of 9 people and got split into a group of 5 and 4.  Keith and I were in the group of 4 with two delightful young ladies from Missouri.  For this adventure, our tour guide was Joe. 

Again, we hopped into an open -air jeep thing and headed out to the opening of Crimson Canyon canyon, which took us through more dirt, sand and wind in our faces.  When we got to the “sandy” part of the road this is where Joe stopped and asked if I wanted to take it slow and easy or fast.  Now what was I supposed to say to that and why was he asking me?  We went fast.

We arrive at our destination and we are at the mouth of a slot canyon.  Well we did come to Utah to see slot canyons and here one was.  This will be great I thought.  We will stroll through this beautiful slot canyon and take some pics.  We took some beautiful pics but strolling through the canon made up about 15% of it.  We went from the bottom to the top of this slot canyon and we had to climb over obstacles.  Yes, I said CLIMB OVER OBSTACLES.  See where I get the unprepared part.    Do we think Keith new this and didn’t tell me?  No, I think he was surprised too.  Some of them weren’t too bad, some were very challenging, and some were “oh shit and oh hell no” obstacles.  Of course, the young ladies did great, Keith did really well and then there was me, the 61 year old short woman. 

You know, I consider myself to be in pretty good shape.  I play 2-3 hours of pickleball 5 times a week.  My aerobic fitness is really good.  With that said, what I learned pretty quickly is that my upper body strength and lower body strength could use some work.  I had to pull myself over boulders and climb up walls and work around awkward unforgiving angles.  Made me really appreciate those athletes on American Ninja Warrior.   This is where I can’t say enough about our tour guide Joe.  He was not going to let me fail and he made sure I could complete each obstacle and of course Keith was there to assist as well.  Sometimes it took one or both of them to pull or push me up and over something. 

When we got to the top of the canyon I kept wondering where the opening was that would take us back to the jeep.  There wasn’t one!  We had to go back down the way we came in.  I will admit, it was easier going down.  Sliding over the obstacles was much easier than climbing over them.  Keith gave Joe a really big tip at the end of the adventure.  He was the best tour guide ever! 

We finally got back to the RV site, plugged everything back in and decided to walk up to the Lodge for dinner.  We hadn’t really had anything of any substance to eat.  Once we finished dinner, we had an hour and half or so before the next adventure, the sunset hike.  Now I am the one that wanted to do this hike.  Sounded romantic right?  Well after dinner I began to feel myself crashing.  I couldn’t get warm and I was just exhausted.  I think all the adrenaline I used up canyoneering and the cold, windy and sandy conditions were taking its toll.  By the time we got back to the RV I was done for the day.  I wrapped up in a blanket and didn’t really move until it was time to go to bed.  I don’t think we missed anything on the sunset hike, the sun was behind the clouds, it was getting cold again and the wind had kicked up. 

Tomorrow I will be all rejuvenated for what will probably be the more difficult adventure for me thus far.  The canyoneering in Elkheart Canyon is where I have to repel down into the canyon “3” times.  What was Keith thinking here?

RV Adventure in Utah

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Are you just itching for a little adventure? Are you tired of wearing that mask and staying home? Are you tried of working and just need a vacation? The answer for us was a resounding YES! We are now fully vaccinated and are ready to get back out there. Where should we go? How about Southern Utah? We have never been there. We’ve heard it is beautiful and it’s May. What better time.

Now we did not just pop up one day and say, “Hey, let’s go to Utah.”  We did some planning.  Months of planning actually.  Finally found a place to take the RV and Keith did all the booking of the activities.  I have learned over the years that Keith does a great job of planning activities and I have gotten really good at trusting his selections.  Full disclosure here.  Sometimes Keith plans activities and I’m terrified at what he has scheduled for us.  He is really good at putting me outside of my comfort zone. He calls it “broadening my horizons.”  I have NEVER been a risk taker or thrill seeker.  Just not in my DNA.  My husband on the other hand?  Well you get the point.  But again, I have learned to trust that he would not put my life in danger, on purpose, and I usually love doing the things he schedules. 

It will take us two full days to get to Utah in the RV.  It takes longer to get anywhere in the RV.  Our goal was to get as far as Albuquerque on day one and day two arrive in Utah.  There is a really nice KOA campground in Albuquerque.  We stayed there last summer when we went to Ouray, Colorado.  We knew this route so there was nothing new or exciting really.  Oh wait, we stopped at a rest stop on Hwy 287 in Texas to use the restroom.  As we pulled in and started to walk up to the facility there it was, the sign from Hell.  “Watch for snakes.  They are watching you.”  Really?    I helped Keith drive a couple of times, we both took naps and listened to a good book.  We arrived safely in Albuquerque, tucked ourselves into the KOA and called it day.

My eyes popped open at 5 a.m. so I got up, made my coffee and turned on the Albuquerque news.  The weather man reported that we would have some rain on our journey and high gusting winds.  None of that is good news when you are in a high profile vehicle, AKA our RV.   We headed west out of Albuquerque and there were four hot air balloons in the air and more on the ground waiting to go up.  Some day we would like to go back during their big hot air balloon fiesta. 

As we continued on west, the rain did start and then the wind kicked up. The scenery was nothing great. Lots of nothing and lots of areas of what appeared to be high poverty. The rain stopped, the wind got worse. Gusts almost blew us off the road a couple of times. Keith drove all the way today. When we got just outside of Flagstaff, we took Highway 89 north to Marble Canyon. Probably another hour and a half through some of the ugliest terrain I have ever seen. Dirt, dirt, mounds of dirt more mounds of dirt and blowing dirt. Lots of blowing dirt and red sand skies.

Along this stretch of road there were old structures set up that were probably used as places for the residents of the area to sell jewelry and other items that they make. These looked abandoned and unusable. They did seem to have a use however. Over the course of the journey along this road, I saw two people stopped to “potty” behind them. I’m thinking they thought if they went behind these facilities they could not be seen by anyone driving down the road. For the woman and the man that I saw, you would be incorrect in your assumption. I certainly saw you. Got a little chuckle out of it actually.

We finally arrived at Marble Canyon. There was a massive pedestrian bridge that crossed the gorge. It was absolutely beautiful. The water running through the canyon was a beautiful color of blue green. Reminded me of the beautiful waters of the Caribbean. There were people taking rafting rides. If Keith had known about that ahead of time, he might have tried to “broaden my horizons.”

Pedestrian Bridge

We finally crossed into Utah and made it to our stop at the Zion Ponderosa Ranch Resort. We checked in, found our spot and settled in for the evening. To say that Keith was exhausted was an understatement. The temperature is much cooler here and we are actually having to use the heater in the RV. Guess we better get a good night’s sleep; the adventure part of the trip starts tomorrow.

Every Day is Valentine’s Day

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Another Valentine’s Day with my sweetie and today’s weather forecast is for snow!  To be honest, every day is Valentine’s day with my sweetie.  But on Valentine’s Day 12 years ago, I was afraid it could be my last with this man I cherish each and every day.  You see on February 10, 2009, just nine months after our wedding, Keith got the call that he had cancer.  For all of you out there that have ever been the recipient of those words, you know everything in your world stops cold when you hear them.  What went from a swollen lymph node on his neck, definitely not cancer said the doctor, to 10 days of antibiotics followed by a needle biopsy, it WAS CANCER.

I have always felt from the moment Keith and I met that he was my gift from God.  Why would God put us together only to take it away?  That was a huge question in my mind.  As the wife of someone with cancer, I can only tell you how it was for me. I cannot begin to fathom how difficult it was for my husband.

On a beautiful, unusually warm day here in Southern Oklahoma in February of 2009, I had driven my mother to the doctor in Texas.  Driving home on I-35 just 40 miles away from home I get a call from my husband.  “The doctor just called.  I have cancer,” he said.   I am trying to stay calm, but it’s not easy.  My throat went dry, tears sprang to my eyes and I thought I was going to throw up.  He asked where I was and I told him I could be home in 30 minutes.  We agreed to meet at the house.  My mind raced and all I could think of is why him. 

I met my husband at home and we sat together on the couch as storm clouds were growing outside.  The thunder boomed and the lighting cracked across the sky.  It felt as if my anger for this situation was manifesting outside.  The local doctor had really not given us much information about anything.  What were we supposed to do now?  Where should we go.  How bad is it?????  We sat together and held each other and just cried.  Then the power went off and we just sat together in the dark.  Brewing just west of town and traveling about ¼ of a mile north of our home was a February tornado.  Welcome to Oklahoma. 

As we sat there in the dark trying to talk through options, I was reminded of something my husband said to me many years before.  “If I ever get cancer I’m not doing chemo and throw up for months on end.” For some reason that memory was fresh in my mind and I got right in my husband’s face and said, promise me you will do whatever it takes to beat this.  PROMISE ME!  When I reminded him of that memory, his response was “I will absolutely do whatever it takes.” 

So fast forward three days to Valentine’s Day 2009.  We were in no way in the mood to dress up and go out, but we had already committed to attending a community fundraising function that included food, drink and dancing.  My only real memory of that night was when Keith took me in his arms for those slow dances and me fighting back the tears wondering if this would be the last time we would be able to dance together.  That’s when in my heart I said to God, “I know you didn’t put this man in my life to just take him away.”

A few days later we traveled to MD Anderson in Houston to begin a path for treatment.  On April 24th, just six days after our first wedding anniversary, Keith completed his final treatment, rang the bell and we headed for home.  During this 2 ½ month period of time is when I learned what a real hero my husband is and just how brave he was.  You see, I am just the wife and caregiver.  I didn’t have to go through weekly all day chemo sessions, which by the way did not make him throw up and he did not lose his hair.  But he did have to undergo radiation treatments twice a day for many weeks. 

The radiation treatments were the hardest.  They had to make a mask for his head to hold him still while the radiation was delivered to his left tonsil.  He had to insert a large wedge-type thing into his mouth to pull his tongue out of the way while the radiation was being delivered.  To make it worse, when they laid him on the table, put the mask over his face, it was BOLTED to the table.  As I sat in the waiting room each and every time with other wives, some of their husbands couldn’t do it and would leave treatment.  Week after week his neck began to look like someone took a blow torch to it and he was in immense pain and discomfort.  After a while he couldn’t swallow food so they had to put in a feeding tube directly into his stomach, which is the only way he could get nutrition for months.  When I think back to that time, I am reminded just how courageous he was and is to this day.  My hero, my forever love.  My heart goes out to all those who have battled this terrible disease and I am FOREVER grateful for the success of Keith’s treatment. 

God did not put us together to just rip us apart.  He put us together for the long haul.  We have decided that we have the in sickness and health part of our marriage vows down pat.  So I encourage everyone to not wait until that one day a year to show your loved one just how much you love them.  Do like the Kings’ do and make every day Valentine’s Day.