Easter Sunday is fast approaching as we conclude yet another Lenten season.  I know when I enter those big red doors into the beautiful stone church, it will be filled with the wonderful smell of Easter lilies.  Music will be playing from the pipe organ.  I will pick up a program and work my way down the left isle to where I always sit on row 7.  I will bow to the altar, take my seat and quietly wait for the service to begin or I can kneel in silent prayer.  At 10 a.m. sharp, the bell outside will begin to toll.  At the conclusion of the 10^th bell, the entire congregation will stand and begin singing the opening hymn.  As we are all signing, there will be a group of people headed down the center isle towards the altar.  Leading the way on that morning will be the thurifer with the wonderful smell of incense filling the air, followed by an acolyte carrying the cross, to which we will all bow as it passes by us followed by the choir, deacon and priest.  Behind those red doors is the place I call my church home.

Finding a church home for your spiritual heart and soul is easy for some and not so easy for others.  I am one of those that had a difficult time finding my place.  I have struggled in various religious denominations.  Never feeling comfortable or like I belonged in any of them.  What was wrong with me?  Why is it so hard?  At 38, I had come to the conclusion that church was just not for me, but I would continue my relationship with God privately.  I was a Christian without a church home.

Six years later I find myself at the very beginning of a relationship with a wonderful man.  He had a church home and it wasn’t long before he invited me to join him one Sunday.  When he told me which church he was a member of I was skeptical.  I had no experience in this church and no idea what to expect.  In the few short months we had been together, I knew that church was important to him, so I accepted.  I stepped out of my comfort zone and went with him.  I can remember vividly that first visit.  It was very confusing and hard to follow.  All of my previous church-attending experiences had me finding a seat, sitting down and rarely moving again until it was over.  Not here.  There was a lot of standing, kneeling, bowing and reading from a book called, The Book of Common Prayer.  Halfway through the service we lined up to head to the altar, where we kneeled and took bread and wine [Holy Communion].  This was the Episcopal Church and this little churchless girl was lost, but quickly found.  I was intrigued and I found myself asking lots of questions, why do you do this and what does it mean when you do that.  I continued to attend church with him every Sunday and after about six weeks, I was hooked, locked in, sold on it.  I knew I had found my church home behind those red doors.

I love the formality of the service itself, the beautiful vestments the clergy wears depending on the church season.  I love bowing to the cross as it makes its way to and from the altar.  There is just something so powerful in that for me.  The music has brought me to tears on more than one occasion.  I have no idea what that is about.  The entire service seems to touch my very soul.

Underneath all that formality is a doctrine that speaks to the deepest parts of my heart and soul.  I learned very quickly that the church accepts and welcomes a wide range of theological ideas and thoughts.  It accepts and welcomes all people.  They do not discriminate against anyone or any group for any reason.  We strive to love our neighbors as ourselves and respect the dignity of every person.  I have not always found that in previous churches and I have always wondered why.  Jesus’ entire message for us was to love one another.  No easy task, but that is what we are all called to do.

That wonderful man that brought me into this church, well I married him.  Not only did he make me whole, but he put me on the path to finding that place where I could put all the pieces together in my spiritual journey.  For those of you out there that have found the place where your heart and soul meet, hallelujah and amen.  If you are still searching for just that right place, don’t give up.   You may just have to step out of your comfort zone and give something a try.  You might even find yourself curious about what goes on behind those red doors.

Peace be with you.